Every year in Biology, we start the year off with an introduction to science unit. We talk about lab safety, the scientific method, proper science technique, and how to write an accurate hypothesis. We wrap up the unit with a test on evaluating experimental design and then a two day “water lab.”
The idea for the water lab is that there has been a nuclear war on Earth and all the water has been contaminated with nuclear fallout. The students (aka, the explorers) go out to another planet where the aliens there don’t speak English. Through gestures and drawings, the aliens give our explorers 8 types of clear liquid.
The lab is to design an experiment and determine which of the eight is the actual water.
Usually, the will do a pH test, using known tap water that they collect as the control, and that will eliminate the water that is mixed with bleach, ammonia, and vinegar. This leaves the water, the sugar water, the salt water, the sprite water, and the rubbing alcohol water. At this point, they’ll usually eliminate the the alcohol because “it smells like a doctor’s office and that’s not natural.” After that, a boiling test usually reveals that the sugar water, salt water, and sprite water won’t boil at the same time the control water does.
Usually, this is what happens…
But this year, my fifth period class, proved me very, very wrong.
“Mrs. H-squared? What was number 7 because (Student) drank it and now she’s been throwing up since three in the morning.”
Are you kidding me right now? Are you freaking kidding me right now???
“Don’t get mad at just her…. (Other Student) drank number three, but she’s fine, so we think that might be the water.”
WHAT?!
These beakers aren’t food safe. They’re clean, but they aren’t food-safe clean because they shouldn’t have to be. It’s a safety rule. I shouldn’t have to remind a group of high school students not to drink out of beakers in the back of the classroom during a lab because that is completely and totally idiotic.
The waters they drank, by the way, were the sugar water and Sprite water, respectfully, but still… There’s no telling what residue was left in those beakers from last year.
I lost it:
“This is absolutely unbelievable. We have the burning lab coming up soon where you will actually LIGHT THINGS ON FIRE, and how can I trust you with an OPEN FLAME if I can’t trust you with a BEAKER OF UNKNOWN WATER? That’s it… we’re done. You’re getting a seating chart tomorrow, which I shouldn’t have to make for a bunch of high school students, and we’re done playing Classcraft. It’s over. I try to reward you for good behavior, but it’s impossible when you don’t give me any.”
There have been better days in my classroom.
And I followed through: I wrote the seating chart during my planning period when the anger at their stupidity about drinking an unknown chemical in my room was still fresh. I’d laid into them about the dangers they put themselves in, fumed about how I wasn’t sure I could trust them with any lab the rest of the year, and shut down every single one of their arguments until the only thing they could do was hang their heads in guilt.
I hope and pray that it was legitimate guilt because you can never be too sure with high school students.
So then we got to today where they came in to the seating chart on the board, and all I heard was, “What? Are you serious? No! This sucks.”
And all I could reply with was, “Well, you drank the water, so…. what did you expect?”
I explained to them that a seating chart in my room was punishment and that they would be in this arrangement for at least a week, but that we would re-evaluate their situation the Monday after next week. I told them that if they get out of this, they would be right back in it whenever I chose, and they should take care not to make it get to that point again.
Then they said:
“Can we have Classcraft back?”
And after a unanimous class vote, they got Classcraft back, so now we’re back where we left off. Today was quiz day, so it was fairly uneventful.
They asked about using their powers on the quiz, but no one has earned them yet, so they all got on to make sure they had learned the powers they needed to get to where they wanted to be, but everyone is still level one. It’ll take awhile to get to the level where they want to be at, but I think they realize now that their grades and behavior will count towards getting them there faster.
Then someone asked:
“Can we have a random event?”
So I gave them a random event….
….And after everything that happened the last two days…
….I have to bring them candy on Monday….